Tom Ford has always been sort of loveably delusional, but Sahara Noir convinces me that he’s just lost any tenuous connection he might have had to reality. No one, in the history of anyone, is going to pay $150 for 50 ml of a mainstream perfume. You know, Tom, if you ever managed to look beyond your grody stubble, you might have noticed that WE’RE IN A RECESSION. GOD.

The reason I’m so disappointed in Tom is that Sahara Noir is a great perfume! It could be extremely popular if the pricing were anything resembling reasonable. Sahara Noir is a perfume for those of us who hate waiting through bergamot or lavender top notes to get to the good stuff. Sahara Noir gets right down to business, and that business is a dry, savory, practically edible amber. This is a firmly unisex perfume, although women might find its total lack of sweetness or creaminess somewhat alienating. I hate to say it, but you probably get your money’s worth with Sahara Noir. Nothing about this heady fragrance smells cheap. That tacky “gold”-plated bottle, on the other hand…

To my wallet’s relief, Sahara Noir is not sweet enough for my personal tastes. So I’d like to give my sample to one of you in the hopes that it will suit you better! If you’d like to win the sample, just leave a comment telling me your favorite Tom Ford fragrance, or maybe the maximum amount you’d be willing to spend on a mainstream fragrance. Or we could reminisce about that time when Tom Ford ate Keira Knightley’s ear! Those were the days.